Working Daughter

Starred review from July 1, 2019

Aiming her words at the many women in the sandwich generation, O'Donnell (Mogul, Mom & Maid: The Balancing Act of the Modern Woman) presents a blueprint for managing a career, children, and aging parents. She applies her own experience and that of others to talk plainly about the challenges of eldercare, the choices to be made, the aspects of caregiving that can and cannot be controlled, and the upside to caring for an aging parent. O'Donnell further considers common issues such as setting boundaries, caregiving with siblings, managing disruptions, and practicing self-care. VERDICT This book provides much-needed support for the growing population of women caregivers. Highly recommended for both public and personal collections.

Copyright 2019 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

August 1, 2019
What happens to women who spend more time with their ailing parents than with their husbands and kids? They can feel overburdened and resentful, writes O'Donnell, a mom of two kids who was the primary caregiver for her now-deceased parents. On the same day in 2014, doctors diagnosed her father with early-onset Alzheimer's and her mother with ovarian cancer. In this honest, advice-filled memoir, O'Donnell admits to feeling like a horrible, selfish person and an overwhelmed one, too. At one point, this super-daughter, who was also working full time, had 196 items on her to-do list for her parents. She advises parents to remove the word should from their vocabulary and to choose some non-negotiables, like being present in their kids' lives and staying employed. Perfect is overrated and impossible, she says. After her father's death in July 2017, she feels a sense of freedom. But it's temporary. Her 51-year-old husband gets diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. The lesson seems to be to expect the unexpected and to place more value on loving and caring for family members.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2019, American Library Association.)