Strangers Assume My Girlfriend Is My Nurse

February 4, 2019
In his second memoir, a collection of 23 essays, Burcaw candidly shares hilarious, cringe-worthy, and poignant stories about his life and living with spinal muscular atrophy (SMA). Readers gain a deeper understanding of Burcaw as the collection progresses—he discusses making jokes to diffuse tension after a “pee fiasco” as a child and becoming a man who uses shocking humor to challenge assumptions about his life. Burcaw juxtaposes introspective and sometimes painful memories with incisive observations on how disability is perceived. Regarding a childhood experience as a guest on the annual MDA Labor Day Telethon, where he was portrayed as pitiable in order to raise money: “Society had it wrong, but their wrongness is so deeply ingrained from centuries of outcasting the disabled that it didn’t help to get angry.” From his sex life to first attempts at trying marijuana edibles, Burcaw doesn’t shy away from topics that might be considered delicate; instead, he emphasizes the awkwardness, celebrating highs and lows alike. Above all, Burcaw succeeds in illustrating that “disability does not equal sadness.” Ages 14–18. Agent: Tina Wexler at ICM.

February 15, 2019
Burcaw (Not So Different, 2017, etc.) returns with a collection of vignettes relating his life as a 25-year-old white man with spinal muscular atrophy, a debilitating disease affecting his whole body.With the same frankness and gallows humor that marked his Laughing at My Nightmare (2014), Burcaw's accounts of madcap road trips, love amid explosive diarrhea, and more demystify and normalize "the nastier side of being human" while critiquing--sometimes poignantly--society's widespread patronization of disabled people. Readers with and without disabilities will cringe at such indignities as kiddie menus, unsolicited prayers, and the titular assumption. Sometimes he gives nondisabled people the benefit of the doubt...if only to keep from ramming his wheelchair into their cars. "Spinraza" and "If I Could Walk" offer nuanced takes on the "cure" debate, exploring the differences between hope and reality and meeting in between. Despite his claim to the contrary, Burcaw matures (somewhat) as he examines his internalized misperceptions, vulnerability, and fears of being a burden. Through his family, friends, and girlfriend's support--and a darkly comical role reversal--Burcaw finally understands a truth that readers navigating disabilities will particularly appreciate: "When you love someone with your whole heart, there's nothing you won't do to keep them safe and comfortable. It's not a sacrifice and it's not a burden; it's a natural instinct."An accessible, smart-assed, and unexpectedly tender exploration of life, love, and disability. (photos, not seen) (Memoir. 14-adult)

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April 1, 2019

Gr 9 Up-In the follow-up to his memoir Laughing at My Nightmare, Burcaw recounts his life with spinal muscular atrophy in this collection of 23 essays. Equal parts humorous, tender, and insightful, the pieces give an unfettered look at Burcaw's life and the assumptions others make about living with a disability. Vignettes include a disastrous trip to New York City with a dying electric wheelchair, starting a career as a motivational speaker, falling in love, and confronting the difficulties of transitioning to life outside of his parents' care. Intimate details, such as going to the bathroom and having relationships, are treated with frankness, and awkward situations are addressed head-on. The stigma he encounters day-to-day, from strangers giving him money to waiters giving him the kids menu, will be eye-opening for readers with and without disabilities. At points, the book is laugh-out-loud funny, making a sometimes difficult subject matter approachable and engaging, and each essay is concise and highly readable. The more vulnerable sections make the biggest impact, such as Burcaw's recurring fear of being a burden on those he loves. VERDICT This collection provides both funny and insightful firsthand anecdotes of living with spinal muscular atrophy. A recommended purchase for both teen and adult collections.-Kathryn Justus, Renbrook School, West Hartford, CT

Copyright 2019 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

February 15, 2019
Grades 9-12 Shane Burcaw (Laughing at My Nightmare, 2014) lives with spinal muscular atrophy (a disease he's had since birth), is a full-time wheelchair user, and needs a lot of assistance. These facts don't limit who he is, however. With uncompromised self-confidence and contagious humor, his no-holds-barred essays address some of the curious, quirky, and even intimate questions folks have about his condition. Early on, Shane used his humor to deflect hurtful comments and questions, and he's since parlayed this into a successful career. His vlog has a solid following; he and his cousin Sarah have a well-established nonprofit; and he regularly travels for speaking engagements. Now, in his mid-twenties, though his body is weakening, his wit is sharp and drives his writing. His sense of adventure cries for more, and he's gotten it: for the first time in his life, he's moved from his apartment in his parents' basement in Pennsylvania to share an apartment with his girlfriend, Hannah, in Minneapolis. Written in his frank, often earthy, style, this will hold readers mesmerized.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2019, American Library Association.)